Tel. 206-612-3828

Services

Why People Come In: 

  • You have argued till you are blue in the face and nothing has changed.
  • You talk to all your friends and they agree with YOU! But that doesn’t really solve anything, now does it?
  • You have given up and there is dead silence…this will not work out well.
  • You want your relationship back to when you both had fun.
  • You don’t know HOW or WHAT to do to fix your relationship.

Who Gets Results From Working With Me.

  • You are ready to listen to what will WORK.
  • You can swallow your pride and start DOING things differently so your relationship changes.
  • You can laugh at yourself. ( Newsflash.) We all are just folks and we all screw up.
  • You are willing and ready to do some reading. (or audio)  I will only see you for a short time, there is
  • a lot to learn!

Who WON”T Want To Work With Me:) Not kidding.

  • People who think their mate is the ONLY person in the relationship that is screwing up. I promise you,
  • they are not.
  • People that really don’t want to change; they are just coming in with their mate cause they won’t shut up!
  • You are sullen and had to be dragged in. (you’ll just leave at some point anyway) So no reason to waste you time:)
  • You can’t put your ego aside and listen.
  • You don’t want any conflict, you just want everything to be nice and easy.

I tell you this because I really have seen a difference in which realationships get better while working with me and which don’t. If you don’t think we are a good match, there are a lot of therapists out there that will work with you, I can give you some good referrals:) I want to work with couples who can see results.

My Take On Relationships: 

  • I see so many people that are just miserable in their relationship. It can be worked out, we have lots of info proving they can.
  • People often just don’t know HOW.
  • If you haven’t done all you know you need to do to make it work, you will always wonder! “What if I had tried harder, done this, or that?”
  • If you don’t change what you are doing in this relationship, there will be the sane problems in the next. Don’t believer me? Think back..
  • what did your past mates say drove them cray about you? What is your mate now saying? 🙂
  • You don’t have to stay married, I don’t believe people should stay married for the sake of the institution.
  • If you have kids, it is VITAL that you do all you can to make a good relationship for your kids. Kids do best in GOOD relationships.
  • If you don’t want to or can’t work it out, I don’t think divorce is off the table. Sometimes people need to divorce to be able to be better parents.
  • Thats just my take on it, want to be clear up front.

How I Work:

  • As you can probably tell, I am upfront and honest. I’m not mean, I just get to the point.
  • I listen to each of you and see what you want and need. I teach you HOW to communicate in a way that has more likelihood of getting you what you want.
  • We put it all on the table, what IS working, it’s not ALL bad. What isn’t working and what needs to change.
  • I work fast, I don’t just set and listen and hope you can figure it out. I give homework and directions so you can make the changes.
  • I give support when things are hard and refer you to individual therapy if I think you need it.

So, If you want to make it better, e-mail me, we will set up a phone chat and go from there. Let’s get it done!

My Background:

I use approaches developed by several people in my work with Relationships. A few of my favorites are: Harvelle Hendrix, who developed Imago Therapy. John Gottman from the University of Washington; and Michelle Weiner-Davis. Also, Terry Real. I use what works for YOU! I don’t use just one approach. Again, my approach is very practical and respects each person’s point of view. There are specific things that can be taught to help couples have good relationships. If both people are committed to working on it, it can be good. Most people just aren’t taught the skills needed to have a good relationship; luckily, they can be taught. I do a lot of teaching in these sessions.

My Fees:

Insurance doesn’t pay for couples.  At least none I know of. I will give you an invoice you can give to your ins. and they might pay some. Fee: $150 for 45 minutes. We start with 45 min. and go from there. I am only taking a few couples at this time, so if you are interested, please e-mail me and we can see if we are a good match. P.S. Relationships can be GREAT! Don’t give up, lets see what we can do.

Sue Bates